If you call up your friends and they tell you the truth, no doubt they would relay their disappointments as well as joys, experienced during the Christmas holiday. Not everyone is the Walton family. In my case, I spent Christmas day by myself and did not hear from a soul on that day, until I made a call in the evening. My husband was working. In the 25 years we have been married, he has held human service positions that more often than not require his presence on holidays. After all, people who need care can’t be neglected just because it is a special day. I understand. However, understanding did not help my perception of being utterly alone while everyone else in the world was opening gifts, sharing a special meal, etc. In fact, I could not have felt more sad or more abandoned. I’ll get over it. As I jokingly told a friend, “Christmas is past. Now I can stop feeling suicidal.”
I tried to remind myself that Christmas is not about me. After all, I did receive some lovely gifts from close friends (that I opened on Christmas Eve). The gifts were thoughtful and suited exactly to my tastes. I am blessed with a handful of wonderful friends, and one close relative who never fails to be in touch on special days and who also sends gifts and cards. She is like a daughter!
Gifts aside, although they are a way of showing love during this special season, Christmas celebrates the birth of Jesus. I know that fact gets lost in all of the hubbub of the shopping frenzy and other preparations. The day is His birthday, or if not the exact date of birth, at least a close approximation.
To get a bigger picture of what was happening in the world, I turned to news headlines of the day. As you may have seen, a video from a captive U.S. soldier dominated Internet news, but was barely mentioned on the news broadcast at night. What the enemy does not realize is that we will not bargain with them. It would only encourage more kidnappings and more demands. Basically, the Taliban was just trying to disrupt Christmas, and in so doing, violated their own rules of Islam.
A good friend of mine listened today while I complained about the non-events of Christmas. (I don’t even feel like Christmas happened this year). She gave me some wise advice that I’d like to share with you.
1) Develop “the attitude of gratitude.”
2) Get up in the morning and start mentally appreciating every little thing, like the hot water you use to wash your face. In Africa, the people don’t have that luxury and have bugs crawling all over them.
3) See the glass as half-full, not half-empty.
4) It doesn’t matter what happens to you; it does matter how you “process” it.
5) Continue taking note of all of your blessings, every day. By the end of a day, you’ll have a long list.
She is absolutely right. Sometimes, we just have to be reminded.
I don’t know about you, but I am more than ready to say good-bye to 2009. I am looking forward to new beginnings in 2010. Part of that plan will be to try to be more creative, have less expectations of other people, and be even more self-reliant and independent than I am now. Have you made any New Year’s Resolutions?
Patricia Cummings
maybe thats the reak reason for Christmas ..To make us STOP and think and remember its NOT ALL about us
Pat, thank you for reminding me. Happy New Year and I hope 2010 is all you wish for.